Yeah for Britax!!!

After our accident, our pediatrician informed us that our infant seat was no longer safe. This is information I had not previously known! So the researching, comparing and shopping began. After reading and reading some more, we found that Britax has the safest car seats with the all-around best ratings. With the insurance company paying for our new car seat, the choice was easy! Now we just had to choose which model, and heaven-forbid, which fabric! We chose the top model and simple, basic fabric, just in case Emily ever has a little brother. (Don't tell Daddy I said that!)
I feel so good about having our little sweetie safe and sound in our car. And not just safe, that seat looks comfy!! Bonus for Emily!

Even cute when anwry....

At the Park....

Ok, so today is rainy and gloomy.... but what do you expect! Memorial Weekend is almost here!! So let's reflect just a couple of weeks back to our wonderful sunshine....

We love going to the park!!

Together at last!!

9 years and 3 baby girls later....

We're like peas and carrots!!

Yum Yum Yummy!!

Happy 6 months birthday Emily love!!

You are 6 months old today!!

Baby girl, you make my heart grow larger with love every day, even though it seems to melt every time I look at you. You have become quite the momma's girl, especially since I have been able to be home with you every day. And, oh, the fun we have had together!! I am so excited for every moment with you!!

My amazing girl! You can already sit up on your own... to play with your toys or to watch what's going on around you. And you waved "hello" at someone today, for the very first time!! I was so shocked, it was the cutest thing I have ever seen!

Emily Jane, you are truly amazing and you prove it to me every time you look at me! You have momma's heart, baby girl. You are my one true love~

Emily's 1st Easter!

With Mommy! With Daddy!

With Grandma!

The best thing about being a momma......

Is holding your sweetest love while they sleep....

Happy 5-months-birthday, my sweetest love-love!

My beautiful, growing girl

...the best 5 months of my life...

My angel sleepy-pie

How beautiful can one baby be??

So much to be thankful for.....

Here is a picture of Emily and her big sister, Zoey, just a few short hours before "it" happened. Snuggled all cozy side-by-side with their favorite stuffed animals.

On our way home from a really fun day of playing in the snow... We were traveling on Hwy 20, we were only about 5 miles out of Bend. It was getting dark, it had been snowing and the roads were really icy. I was driving really cautiously because these conditions can be really scary. This "person" (I'd love to call him several more vulgar names), decides that it would be a good idea for him (and his 3 other passengers) to pass us. Please take note that I am driving about 35 mph and I drive a Durango. It is not a small vehicle. Anyways, he proceeds to move into the oncoming lane and gets back over, I am thinking, good, because that would be stupid. Well, not more than about 15 seconds later, he proceeds to get in the oncoming lane, again. Just as he was about to go around, his 4Runner slips on the ice. Go figure, Mr. Smarty-Pants. He hits the rear left corner of our Durango and sends us spinning. We slide (in slow-motion, I swear) sideways into the oncoming lane and proceed to do a 360. As we are sliding backwards, we get to watch his 4Runner go into the ditch on and flip over a couple of times. That is a sight I will remember for a long time. Our Durango turns all the way around, goes into the ditch on the opposite side of the road. As we finally come to a stop, Rocky makes sure that we're all okay, jumps out of the car and runs to see if they are okay. He slips in the middle of the road and falls on his back. That's how slick the highway was. Anyways, he gets to them, and helps them out. They are all okay. As I watch him to make sure they were okay, I'm busy calming sweet Zoey down, she's really shaken up. If you can believe it, my angel Emily sleeps through it! As soon as Rocky returns to be with us, I try so hard to keep cool. (Which he later commented on how calm I was the entire time.) I get out of the Durango, pull my girls out, hold them and just cry.
That was way too close for me. It really scared me how one small move from someone else could have completely changed my life. I don't know what I would do had this have been any different. I wanted to rip that guys head off. Just to think of what he could have taken from me.
Thank god, someone was watching over my family that day... I am so thankful. FOR EVERYTHING. Especially for the safety my Durango provides my family!

Before I Was a Mom.....

Before I Was A Mom,

I made and ate hot meals.

I had unstained clothing.

I had quiet conversations on the phone.

Before I was a Mom,

I slept as late as I wanted and never

worried about how late I got into bed.

I brushed my hair and teeth everyday.

Before I was a Mom,

I cleaned my house each day.

I never tripped over toys or forgot

words to lullabies.

Before I was a Mom,

I didn't worry whether or not my

plants were poisonous and

I never thought about immunizations.

Before I was a Mom,

I had never been puked on, pooped on,

spit on, chewed on, peed on or

even pinched by tiny fingers.

Before I was a Mom,

I had complete control of my mind,

my thoughts, my body and I slept all night.

Before I was a Mom,

I never held down a screaming child

so that doctors could do test or give shots.

I never looked into teary eyes and cried.

I never got gloriously happy over a simple grin.

I never sat up late hours at night

watching a baby sleep.

Before I was a Mom,

I never held a sleeping baby just because

I didn't want to put it down.

I never felt my heart break into a million

pieces when I couldn't stop the hurt.

I never knew that something so small

could affect my life so much.

I never knew that I could love someone so much.

I never knew I would love being a Mom.

Before I was a Mom,

I didn't know the feeling of having

my heart outside my body.

I didn't know how special it could feel

to feed a hungry child.

I didn't know that bond between a

Mother and her child.

I didn't know that something so small

could make me feel so important.

Before I was a Mom,

I had never gotten up in the middle

of the night to make sure all was ok.

I had never known the warmth,

the joy, the love, the heartache

or the satisfaction of being a Mom.

I didn't know that I was capable of feeling so much

Before I Was A Mom.

Happy 4 Month Birthday, Emily Jane!

4 Months Old Today.... My sweet girl!!
I remember the first time I felt you move inside my growing belly. I remember never taking my hands off of my belly, I loved to feel like I was holding you, comforting you. I remember patting your little bottom when you would get the hiccups. I remember crying tears of joy and relief when the doctor who performs specialty ultrasounds came back in to the room to announce, "Your baby is perfect!" I remember being so excited to have you in my arms I couldn't stand it!
I remember the first time I heard you "squeak" the moment you were born. I remember the first time I laid my eyes on you in your daddy's arms. You were so happy, so beautiful and so perfect. I remember the first time I held you, my perfect angel. I knew at that moment that my life would never be the same. The love I felt for you was new, intense and like nothing else in this world. I remember being SO thankful that you were so healthy and so strong! I remember our first days together, I don't remember putting you down! You were so tiny, so precious. I remember bringing you home, giving you a tour of our home, just like my dad did when I was born. I remember our first weeks together, I never put you down, even to sleep.
I remember your first smile, just a tiny baby. Everyone said it has to be from gas, I secretly knew different. We have a special bond, you, me and daddy. I remember when you started talking. You had so much to say to us!!
I remember the first time you cried to be in mommy's arms. I have never felt so special, so needed, so loved. I realized at that moment that I need you more than you need me.

It's hard for me to believe that you are 4 months old already, time is moving way too quickly for me. Feels like it was just yesterday I found out that we were pregnant! All of these memories are so special to me and will never be lost.
I love the way your face lights up when you see your daddy. You have a special smile reserved just for him and it warms my heart. I love the way you smile at mommy in the dark when you wake up to eat, your smile lights up the room for me. I love the way you kick your little arms and legs when mommy and daddy pick you up from daycare after a long day of work, this is the best part of our day. I love the way you touch my face when I hold you, or hold onto me so tight like you don't want me to put you down.
You have given us so much joy and so much love, much more than you will ever know. Every day I am so thankful and grateful that we have been blessed with such an angel. You have forever changed our lives and I thank you for being my sweet baby girl.

Mommy Watch Me Grow!!

My sweet Valentine! :)
It seems like just yesterday we found out that we were pregnant!! And it has already been a year! Emily will be 4 months old next week and I simply cannot believe how fast time is flying by. You always hear people talk about how fast time goes by and you really don't know until you are watching your precious child grow before your eyes. I have been struggling with this for the past couple of days because I had a realization yesterday! I have been buying all of Emily's clothes in size 0-3 months. I bought her this adorable sundress, size 0-3 months because it looked huge! I got it home last night, laid it next to Em, and sure enough.... she'll be too big for it in a week!! And it has been 20-30 degrees here, how will she wear this sundress?? Silly momma, doesn't want to accept that her tiny baby is growing up! And to think it took almost one whole month for her to finally grow into her newborn clothes....

Lucky momma~

My beautiful daughter.
This sweet baby girl has my heart, my soul. I belong to her. I feel like I was created by my mother for this purpose- to create, nurture and love my baby girl. I am so overwhelmed with this feeling, this love that nothing could ever touch. Is this too much? I wonder if all moms feel this way. I am so blessed and so lucky to be given this amazing chance to raise a daughter. I have so much love in my heart for her.
She has created something in me, too. She has made me so happy, so loving.... I felt the difference in myself the moment I gave birth to her. What a lucky momma~

Is it that weird to miss being pregnant??

I mean, don't get me wrong.... I am the happiest momma you'll ever meet. I am so lucky to have my sweet baby girl in my life. I just LOVED being pregnant. I'll always cherish that time in my life.... creating the most amazing person.... my love, my life, my sweet Emily~ I was the happiest that I have ever been in my entire life! (besides now, of course!) I really miss having her with me at all times!!

My big girl

My baby girl is getting so big.... It hits me when our daycare provider comments on how big she is from just over the weekend. And today, we noticed her head is at the top of her carseat! She used to have a preemie head supporter!! She is growing way too fast for me.
I have decided that 3 months in age is sooo fun!! She holds her head up perfectly, she looks around and focuses on everything and everyone, and can recognize mommy & daddy in a crowded room. She smiles at mommy and daddy, and if she warms up to you, she'll smile at you, too. She doesn't give those away for free, ya know.
I do have to add that she has become quite the momma's girl. This weekend at my mom's house, a couple of times when she was getting tired, she'd be fussy and figity until she was in momma's arms. Oh, how she melts my heart. My whole life I have waited for this sweet baby and I never imagined how much I would love her and need her. I think I need her more than she needs me! I always knew that I would love my child like no other, but at the moment she was born I have felt a love for her that is so pure, so strong, so true. My baby girl, my world....